beyond existence there's life

I have tried to find  shape made of words for what I feel now. You told me that I always know what to say, but it's hardly the case.

There are moments in which life inspires me, and then words flow like champagne in my head and I could write for hours and each single thought would make sense to me.

sometimes I am empty. Nothing in me, nothing out of me.

One single moment like electricity passing from one soul to the other and the thin unawareness implodes creating a feeling you can't understand.

I don't care understanding anything. I want to feel.

Understanding kills my emotions and I am made of emotions. 

I feel trapped.

I need to open my wings and fly, burn myself with the sun, crash on the ground. But not having my light being blown off like I would be a candle.

You crossed a path.

I was on that path.

Call it coincidence, statistic.

I call it destiny.

I believe the half of me is out there and if I follow the common sense I am never going to find it.

What matters is feeling.

Feeling until we can.

Feeling pain, pleasure, happiness or despair, that's not important.

The important is that if with your words, your voice, your presence, even for a minute you make me feel alive, that minute will be a minute actively lived.

I want to live. Existing is not enough.

I have been forced, abused, brainwashed, I have known fear, hate, filthy passion and desperate happiness, and it all went. 

You are the sun today, you can chose to shine a while for me, still being innocent even if we are stealing apples from the knowledge tree, you can chose to send me back to black.

I will have just missed a chance.

So will you.

I am not able to write all these emotions on a line. I have let the wind come in and they'are all messed up now. 

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NOTE OF THE AUTHOR: I am going to rest now, up to the late night hours