Sometimes you don't see it coming. Seriously.
I always thought I had defined my taste and feelings but probably I am never content.
I was planning to stop being a dreamer, a helpless romantic lost soul but then she came.
I mostly don't trust women. They have the gift of making you lose control, because they know where the center of your control resides.
"You'll have to work together, so don't sweat it Boris, she is a professional."
I sulked without showing it, trying to cope with the bad feeling possessing me at her sight, but when James opened the door and she walked in, I felt uncomfortable, in a way I didn't like.
"Romi" she said shaking my hand "My name is Romi Borgois". Her smile had something familiar, or maybe it just felt like that, I said to myself, concentrating my eyes on the project sheet that was spread on the table.
Romi explained her point of view on the works we had to start for the renovation of the warehouse, she talked calm and concentrated. I followed the movements of her lips and James had to answer her questions to me more than once.
James and I are friends since ages, and business partners since almost as long.
"Now I got why you didn't want to work with her..." he said once the meeting had finished "you were scared you'd like her?"
Was I? The question kept turning in my head like a vortex.
"Don't be such a jerk James...I am not happy to work with her. Competent women scare me in a way" and after saying that I smirked at my friend who was already shaking his head in disbelieve.
"You are really peculiar Le Boursier! I have never known anybody as weird as you are..."
James was trying to be serious but you could see that he was amused and curious about how my relationship with Romi would evolve.
"Sure" I replied "I just hope my first attempt to being normal is not going to finish in a black eye..."
"Or blue balls..." James replied sardonic.
I rolled my eyes at him.
"What about going to drink something? I need some alcohol to get sober" I said laughing and James laughed along.
We had a drink at Carl's and we enjoyed talking and remembering the past, like we normally do every time we meet outside of work.
The evening was promising fun and relaxed until a voice from behind my back made me stiffen
"Can I join?"
James almost spit his beer on me, probably my face had to be ridiculous, even Carl was laughing at me.
"S...sure" I said gesturing the seat beside me with my free hand "what are you drinking?"
"a beer will do for me too..."
Romi smiled, no sign of mocking amusement in her expression.
She had caught the guys laughing at me still she was not going to use that against me, for the moment.
She joined the conversation and I came to know that she was the oldest of three kids and that her dad had left home when she was a child. She had been married once, but after a few years she had understood that she was not "made for digging roots in a place where there was no food for her mind".
I understood her. Deeply. For the first time in years I felt connected.
She was not a danger for me because we were talking the same language.
James received a phone call "Bo I need to leave, Michael needs my help to sort out some shit at the site..."
"I can come along!" I said. James looked at Romi and then at me with a severe expression
"I can't allow you to leave a lady alone..."
I put my hands up to show him I was going to surrender and he nodded.
"I see you guys tomorrow. Enjoy your time..."
"It's a problem for you that he is gone?" Romi's voice had a sad shadow in it like she expected to know the answer.
"Not at all, do you?" I replied trying to sound sweeter than I was used to.
We drank some more beer and the conversation went smoother.
"Woo...it's three o'clock. I think I'll call for a taxi"
"I can drive you home..." I said "If you want to, that is..."
She looked aside troubled at my request but then she smiled.
"Thanks" she replied.
We didn't talk all the way long. Jazz music was flowing and filling the car.
the way she indicated was leading outside the city. The landscape changed into trees and grass fields.
"Here we are" she said indicating a small brown house at the side of the road.
I stopped the car and turned towards her.
"I am not going to ask you in Boris. Not tonight."
I didn't reply, since I didn't know what she was trying to say.
"I would like to kiss you, if it's fine for you..."
I leaned towards her and we kissed. It was a kiss with no pretense or hidden meanings.
It was this kind of kiss that makes you feel happy just because they happened and you surely want more, but you don't need to force that. It will come from itself.
I had always been this guy who didn't really mind who was landing in his bed, but then she came and she made the whole thing about life seem so easy and beautiful.
When she went inside, without even turning to check on me, I put my hands behind my head and inhaled the scent of her that was still filling the car, jasmine and cinnamon I thought.
The way back home I draw very slowly looking at the fields illuminated by the full moon and the night seemed beautiful again, and life with it.
